I had just watched a tv show that had Native American tribes represented and some long lines of the languages those tribes used irl. The contents weren't that much new information to me, but the language intrigued me and made me feel really proud that at least someone had had the effort to use the original languages in a tv show script.
After that I was sharing a loving moment with a dear one, when all of a sudden a vision of a teepee alone in a forest "forced" itself into my mind (I rather allowed it to come through as I noticed the vision kept nudging my mind again and again).
I saw the two of us as Native American people living there and I experienced feelings that I've never ever felt in this life. In that vision I had recently moved "out there" with this loved one, we were a pair. The Native American me was thinking how honorable it was now to take the same position or place both my mother and my grandmother in that life had had as a wife, living an independent life of a Native American.
I come to realize other things existing around me. I never knew that someone could feel SO SAFE and so at peace with the circle of life, even that I thought I had understood the concept already thoroughly in this life. Na-ah. Oh I was so wrong. The part where I thought I understood was merely a theory in my head I had chosen to take as a part of my reality, in contrast to this experience I had last night.
During this vision I was as conscious about my present self as I was conscious about this life as a Native American woman. I feel this happened outside the experience of time limits, somehow these two versions of me connecting with each other.
I started to feel huge homesickness to not that teepee in the woods, but to the very natural connection with Mother Earth and the natural rhythm and style of living people had those days. I could feel how fluent and happy life was in it's simplicity. We all were so safe in the hands of our Mother and we were always ready to take responsibility and give her a hand in continuing the natural cycle of things. Giving back and letting go were important parts of our culture. We were part of the system, not outside of it-- as we actually are today. The general modern human concept of what we feel is connection is so wrong and full of lies. We are very much ungrounded.
I understood in that instant, how UNSAFE people feel these days even in "safe" cities in countries with a seemingly working social security and welfare system around the world. It was horrible to feel and see that contrast. But what we've gotten used to only creates the new definition for safe. Getting along doesn't mean we feel actually truly safe.
I now understand I hadn't understood what that word means. We're constantly bombarded with heavy energies pretty much anywhere we go and it's all around in our environment. We are so unconnected to to our planet, we are in constant state of unbalance (or ungrounded as people call it).
In this life I've been afraid of forests and I've slowly learnt to let go of that fear. For that brief moment as it was I felt what it is to have the nature as our home. It gave me a melancholic hope for the better and sadness that we've gone so far from this.
In my vision Mother Earth was a GIVER, not enslaved and exhausted getting her shell, where the life happens, more ruined day by day. She was providing everything we, us, it's children needed as long as we were a part of that natural cycle. Now she doesn't have the energy to do it, because we don't give the energy back to her and help maintain the balance
These days we don't let her grow her trees and plants around us. Those natural earthly antennas connecting us to her energy could grant us that feeling of connection and safety-- All of which would be the most natural state we could have here on Earth, if we just didn't sabotage the balance.
People, we must stop being only takers. This will not destroy only the nature, it torments us! Mother Earth would have so much more to give considering our peace and happiness, but we don't let her. I understand there exists so many paths for experiencing new things and all, but as long as we know we have the choice to change our ways of living-- in my point of view, we have the responsibility.
I had never cried in front of this dear one, but this experience and knowledge came to me so powerfully, I couldn't help myself, even that I tried to escape it. That homesickness for our connection to the Earth, was so huge and realizing all this bad bad stuff going on across the globe was too overwhelming. But it was good to cry, see and feel. This experience taught me so much things I hadn't known or realized before. Especially that feeling of safety.
I'd describe this vision of a past life definitely a changing point in life. I've had huge curiosity in Native American cultures and I've started to learn it in small bits for a few years now. More and more I understand I want those cultures to teach me more things and I definitely see myself now sharing more their wisdom onward in future.